Long Nights

Nothing feels right since we let Niko go.  Nothing.

I came home from work today and was not thinking, just reacting, and I went to the back door to let Niko in… but he was not there.  I just stood there.  Lost it.  Crying.

14 years of having a companion like that was just ripped away and I am angry.

It does not feel real to me yet, or maybe it does and that is why I am so upset.  I am sure there are people out there that think it is silly to be upset over a dog and I get it, but he was the one constant thing in my life that never let me down.  Niko got me through some of the worst times of my life and now it is all gone.

I don’t have Alex the first half of the week so the house it quiet.

Friends are trying to get me back to dating and I am not sure I am up for it.  Everyone tells me to try a dating site but frankly, I find that kind of creepy.  I would rather just be alone and let something happen if it is meant to be.  I don’t NEED a relationship, but it would be nice to have someone to hang out with once in a blue moon.

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